Disillusion

I guess one could say I tend to live in a fantasy world or maybe a world of dreams may be a better way to put it.  I’ll be the first to step up and tell anyone and every one that I’ve got so much to be thankful for.  Little Charlie is doing well and I hope he will be home soon.  It’s my take on me and how I feel about me.  I hate it, but I can feel myself sliding right back into my dark room again and it’s not my “darkroom”.  The room I’m talking about is one that just sucks the energy out of you.  I think this goes hand and hand with the dreams I dream -- only to watch the seconds tick by and along with the minutes so goes my dreams.   You think one thing and look so forward to it and then it’s nothing it was all just an illusion of sorts.  I just feel like I’m second string in everything only getting to bat when there’s no chance for a win so they let me in just to try and make me feel better.  I was telling myself I wasn’t going to write things like this anymore, but it’s my only outlet…