"Things change. They always do, it's one of the things of nature. Most people are afraid of change, but if you look at it as something you can always count on, then it can be a comfort." ~ Robert Kincaid (The Bridges of Madison County)Things do change and change fast is seems. It was 4 years yesterday that we lost Jeff and there's been very few days that in some way I haven't thought of him... I keep telling myself as long as we remember and keep them in our hearts --there they will stay--.
Sometimes change is good for soul and at times change can take the life out of our souls, but one thing is for sure things will change.
As for me... I'm not sure where I stand on change... one moment I welcome it the next I cuss it... I want it, but yet I can't seem to let go of the past to embrace it. I guess one morning I'm going to wake up and realize... my life has slowly went by while I was looking for change... and the whole time change was just a breath away...
In a way I envy Robert Kincaid... and like Robert said:
"The old dreams were good dreams; they didn't work out, but glad I had them." ---
yes the old dreams were good -- I just wish I had the faith to dream new dreams now. I've gotten to were I'm afraid to dream of the future and seem to live in the past more and more... the past little bit I've noticed that I seem to be wanting to distance myself from others... even the ones I love the very most... I just don't want to feel the sting of hurt anymore...
Since Dad's death the old saying "Time heals all wounds"... well I'm not so sure... yes over time the "sting" goes away but the pain is still there. Like with Jeff... 4 years has come and gone... and the pain of losing a close cousin (more like my brother) still fills my heart...
