Light from the Darkness

When one door of happiness
closes, another opens;
but often we look so long at the closed door that
we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
~ Helen Keller

I often wonder if at some point and time I would ever be happy again. There have been times I felt like the darkness would over take me so why fight.  It's very strange that just when I feel the night is the darkest there's a streak of light of hope breaks through. 

Sunrise Sept 01, 2013mj

Happy

 All God’s angels come to us disguised.
~James Russell Lowell 

July 30, 2013 -- Tuesday

Today I’ve had one of the best days I’ve had in way to long…. My dear friend
Sundra came down yesterday to visit friends and we had dinner together last
night. Sundra is one of those friends I may not see for a year of more, but when
we see each other it’s just like we had seen each other just a day or so ago.
Being alone all the time one sometimes forgets how it feels to laugh and how
good it is to have someone talk to. In the past few years today has always been
a bad day, but today I’ve felt more alive than I have in a very long time. I
wish everyone could have a "Sundra”… someone that likes you for who you are and
wants nothing from you but your true friendship.

Sunrise Today

April 08, 2013

The golden moments in the stream of life rush past us and
we see nothing but sand; the angels come to visit us, and
we only know them when they are gone.  ~George Elliot

When I got up this morning the morning sky was all cloudy and dark for the most part and just before I was about to leave for work I looked out back and saw this bright orange/yellow sky. I just had to get a picture of it… I was thinking how I could possibly use it in a slideshow at some point.

When I got to work I read where Margaret Thatcher had passed away. Mrs. Thatcher was a strong lady and I feel she was a good leader. I’ll always remember how she stood with President Ronald Reagan.


When I got home this afternoon I learned that Annette Funicello passed away also today. Annette was an original Mouseketeer. I like what she said :

She remembered in 1987: "Mr. Disney said to me one day, 'Annette, I have a favor to ask of you. I know all the girls are wearing bikinis, but you have an image to uphold. I would appreciate it if you would wear a one-piece suit.' I did, and I never regretted it."


Now I know why the sunrise was so nice… Heaven was opening its gates for two great ladies.

Dad

Loneliness is about the scariest thing out there. ~ Joss Whedon

It’s been a long time I know… for some reason I just haven’t been able to write. I think about it, but I just can’t sit down and do it. Maybe soon I can get back in to it.

It’s been just over two years now that Dad passed away. This morning when I called Mom she was talking about him a lot. She realizes now how Dad’s last couple of years must have been. Today she told me that Dad had to be lonely there at the house every day while she worked. Dad had gotten were it hard for him to get around and he couldn’t go out in the yard, couldn’t drive anymore so all he had to do was watch tv, take care of his little dog, Newly, and watch the birds at the feeder. He always enjoyed telling me about his birds and now when I go up to see Mom I like to sit in his chair and watch “his” birds. A funny thing happened not long ago. Mom had to talk Dad’s little dog to the vet . When the vet asked what the dogs name was Mom said, “Charles named her Newly, but I don’t know where he come up with the name”. When I went up to see Mom a couple of weeks ago she told me that she and Gene had figured out where Dad got the name Newly from, he had gotten it from watching Gunsmoke. All those years and Mom and my brother didn’t know that … guess I knew Dad on a different level or maybe I’m a lot like him. He loved Gunsmoke and it wasn’t long after Dad passed away that “Marshal Matt Dillon’ passed. It’s my hope that heaven is as real as we think and people like my Dad can talk to the ‘Marshal Matt Dillon’s’ that we looked up to. To say I miss Dad is an understatement… the old house just isn’t the same and Mom is now left alone and even thro she tries to fight off the loneness, I can hear it in her voice when I call her. Yes loneness is a frightening feeling.



My new grandbaby, Mari Caroline, will be six weeks old tomorrow.

Being Left Behind

Time is what we want most,
but what we use worst.
~ William Penn

Where did the time go? I can’t believe it was in September when I last wrote in here. For some reason I just haven’t wanted to write. Since my last visit Trent had his first birthday and I had my 57th birthday. That really makes me wonder – WHERE HAS THE TIME GONE…

When we start a job and have been there for years we start to dream about how it will one day feel to retire. I’m getting close to, but with very mixed feelings. I feel like I’m falling behind. Others are planning their future with the hospital and I see my past. I’ve had a good run with the hospital; I’ve worked hard and worked on many projects. The idea of giving my desk up and someone else sitting there kinda makes me uneasy. I had always hoped someday to do what I’ve always enjoyed, photography, but I don’t know if that will ever be. Everyone likes my work, but no one wants to own any of it.

Maybe within the next year I’ll find that peace that I need and again start looking forward to my retirement years.